Letter She Wrote...

If you could write a letter to 16 year old you - what would you write?

Here is my letter:

Dear Toni,

Hey Sweetie - It's me, - You at age 22.

Yes, you have survived past your 21st birthday - I know there was a time there where you thought you wouldn't. But you did it - and there is still life for you on this side of the fence. I know that right about now, mum and dad have moved you to the farm, and you feel - away from your friends. But they have done it with the best intentions - they didn't know how to handle what happened to you anymore then what you did. What happened will still be in your thoughts from years from now - there will be tough times ahead, choices to be made and friends to lose and find again. But you will always have friends to help you through it all, even if you have to go it alone at times.

I want you to know now - Don't be afraid of change. Things will whether you are ready for them or not. Embrace the changes - embrace the farm, you will not regret it.

Now, I will not tell you to keep up with your studies - cause I know that you won't listen to me. Instead, keep on writing and keep on smiling! Write your feelings down, find that special place. Write as much as you can - this is what makes you happy. Smile, even when you are sad and life is treating you unfairly - smile anyway. People may say things that hurt, don't let them get to you. Just Keep on smiling and it will get you through the day.

I wish for you to be happy and to keep your imagination alive. Cherish your feeling for the rain, the sun, the elements and the seasons around you. There is still magic in this world and you will see it.

About the boys - RELAX! They are just human beings, though at times, they may seem like a completely different species... Treat them like friends, as if you fixate on them, you'll scare them off! But it's not you - it's the way you are acting. Just be yourself and it will work out. I do have to warn you though, even if you act yourself, you will still get hurt, that is life. Don't be afraid to get hurt - it is a lesson and better in the long run. You still have a long way to go in that department - but hold on and I'm sure that you will be fine!

Expect the unexpected. - leave your mind open to possibilities. You may be shocked to hear this - but you love Surprises! "Nobody expects the Spanish inquisition!" - this may mean nothing to you now, but in a few years you'll be laughing!


Be patient. It's a simple as that. Everything doesn't have to happen now. When your patient, believe it or not - things can happen faster then when you are not. Listen more. Stop talking and listen to what others have to say - seriously! (you still struggle with this at age 22, but you are getting better!) If you try this thing called listening, you will learn more in the long run...

Two more things before I go - Keep asking questions no matter how silly you think they are... you'll be surprised at how many others are thinking the same thing, and how much information you can receive from just one simple question. AND - read "Persuasion" by Jane Austin. You'll see why and you'll love it!

Keep your head up and don't change for anyone but yourself - you don't have to justify everything you do, as long as you are happy with it, no one else has to be. :-)

Love forever sweetie,

Toni